I Want Your Sex

Relationships in your twenties can feel like trying on different outfits until you finally find one that fits. The problem is, a lot of people settle for the first one that’s comfortable enough, never bothering to see what else is out there. Gregg Araki’s I Want Your Sex made me think about that idea, as Cooper Hoffman’s character discovers that maybe the only way to figure out who you are is by stepping way outside your comfort zone.

For Elliot (Cooper Hoffman), getting a grip on life hasn’t exactly been easy. His relationship with his girlfriend, Minerva (Charli XCX), feels more like an appointment than a romance, and he isn’t contributing much to the rent he shares with his roommate, Apple (Chase Sui Wonders). Hoping to turn things around, Elliot lands an interview with renowned artist Erika Tracy (Olivia Wilde), whose work is, for lack of a better description, unapologetically sex-positive.

Not only does Elliot get the job, but Erika quickly takes a personal interest in him, inviting him to become her submissive. Surprisingly, Elliot jumps at the opportunity. At first, it’s exciting. He’s experiencing things he never imagined, but before long the relationship begins to consume every part of his life. His relationship with Minerva falls apart, tensions grow with Apple after a disastrous threesome, and despite the emotional roller coaster Erika puts him through, Elliot always seems to come back wanting more. As messy as everything becomes, it may also be exactly what he needs to finally figure out who he is.

Written by Karley Sciortino and Gregg Araki, I Want Your Sex feels like a message to a generation that’s often accused of living life through a screen instead of experiencing it firsthand. Growth usually comes from trying new things, and for Elliot, that just happens to involve leather heels, floggers, and a whole lot of awkward self-discovery. No judgment here.

Araki wraps those ideas in a vibrant, neon-soaked visual style, mixing noir influences with his trademark offbeat sense of humor. The result is a movie that’s every bit as colorful as its characters and surprisingly funny along the way.

What I Want Your Sex is really interested in is modern intimacy—or, depending on your perspective, the lack of it. Araki and Sciortino don’t pretend there’s only one way to approach sex or relationships. Instead, they acknowledge the anxieties many young people have while also embracing the wide range of experiences people bring to intimate relations. Beneath all the provocative imagery is a simple question: what happens if you stop being afraid and actually give yourself over to desire? The answer turns out to be far more thoughtful—and often much funnier—than you’d expect.

Cooper Hoffman and Olivia Wilde have terrific chemistry, with Wilde especially looking like she’s having an absolute blast. The supporting cast, which includes Johnny Knoxville, Sandra Cho, Mason Gooding, Daveed Diggs, Chase Sui Wonders, and Charli XCX, all get memorable moments to shine.

I do think there’s a version of this story that bites a little harder, but I also think this one knows exactly what it wants to say. It’s funny, stylish, unexpectedly thoughtful, and another reminder that the experiences that leave the biggest marks on us aren’t always the ones we see coming.

Brian Taylor

Member of the North Texas Film Critics Association, and lover of all things Cinema